I am not sure why I chose to come to this life with such an intense ability to feel, and to hold such great compassion…..

I am on this return trip from Chattanooga, 1st flight of two between here and Maine. Suddenly the emotion I feel for Joe (my biological father) is just catching me in a big way. It is so hard to leave him EVERY time.

I am so grateful to be living in a reality where I have actually found him, my brother, my sisters, stepmother, my extended family, my heritage, and now…..I am slowly losing him. I do my best to stay in the present moments and embrace the blessings of this reality, one I yearned for over so many years, but…..Sweet Jesus……

I spent 28 years without him, wondering, questioning, imagining. Then, I met him, face to face, and literally looked into the eyes of a familiar broken soul. Immediately I healed a piece of myself. Hello familiar stranger, I have missed you.

I see passed all of the faults to the lonely, misunderstood, guilt ridden, hurting soul.

As I sit here on this plane, only flying because I can find the courage to get an extra visit, from fear he will forget me. That is a pain I cannot bare. Slowly losing him, as the clouds of confusion set in is….indescribable.

No anger for time we lost. No bitterness for years of missing pieces. I am stronger for it. Peace be with you and, somewhere in the depths of your heart, amidst the troubles of your journey, may my love be felt, and perhaps heal even the smallest pieces of your soul.

Until my return, I will keep you in the compassion of my heart. Much love.